Audio
Tablet Seven
VIRTUES OF
MARRIAGE
<1>The truth below should be understood by both
partners who want to marry. <2>Parents and society are also
responsible to make sure that both the man and woman understand the
truth which underlies a marriage, are aware of its spiritual and
social values, are ready to carry out their responsibilities in this
unification, and are familiar with their duties.
<3>Each person should choose his/her partner but
parents and elders can assist in this matter. <4>However,
they should not impose their will on the choice, unless a young
person is making an obvious mistake from a spiritual or
psychological point of view -- but not from a financial or social
point of view (position, class, race, etc.).
1- Understanding Marriage From The Spiritual Point Of View:
a- Origin (
):
<5>In the beginning the
male and
female
energy was in a balanced
state in each being (they were in the image of
God) (
).
b- Separation (
):
<6>In the course of
evolution, however,
it became necessary to separate them into two parts as
male and
female. This was
necessary in order to be able to help each
unit consciousness more effectively. <7>Before this
happened, the
unit
consciousness did not feel any need for help from the external
world, so they would not strive to progress toward higher
consciousness.
c- Unification ():
<8>When a man and woman understand that they are greatly
attracted to each other on a spiritual level (not physically or
intellectually) in such a way that they are almost sure they are
each other's soulmate, then they should marry. <9>However,
marriage between an unmatched male and female can also be successful
if they understand the spiritual truth behind the unification
through marriage. By focusing on
God
and becoming one with Him, they also become one with each other, as
each other's halves.
<10>As the false
ego tends to direct a person to
self-centeredness,
the spiritual realization, however, can only be gained by dissolving
the
false ego through
being more concerned about others than the self. <11>This can
be achieved very easily by marriage if each partner becomes more
concerned about the physical, mental, and spiritual progress of the
other partner. This will cause one to forget about one's little
false ego (self-centeredness)
and to merge with the other partner by understanding his or her
needs instead of thinking about the self. Therefore, the person
creates the ability to come out of himself and be concerned about
others. <12>Only then can these couples manifest the love and
selflessness of the Lord by their own example toward each other and
others.
d- Generation and Appreciation (Children):
<13>With
having children, parents also become creators. Therefore they can
feel the same love that
God feels about His
creation and the humans. This also increases the spiritual
realization of the couple toward
God-realization. <14>If
they love their children so much (and they actually did not create
the children but were only tools used to bring them to the world),
you can imagine how much
God
loves humans and His creation which He personally created!
e- Independence (Separation From Parents):
<15>Marriage
also brings independence for couples. As stated in Genesis
2:24, "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and
shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." They
will gain their own family and become an independent, separate
family block in society.
f- Duties: <16>The man is the provider and
protector of the family. He should also be the priest and
spiritual example (Divine Logic) for others. <17>The woman is
the comforter (Divine
Grace) and coordinator of
the family. She is also the center of the family life.
<18>Man and woman are equal in progressing physically,
mentally, and spiritually, and all facilities should be provided
equally for both to progress in these three levels. <19>However,
equality does not mean similarity. Men and women are different
physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually (the
female body is more suited to manifest
Grace, and
male
-- Logic). So they should realize this fact and act according to
their own natures.
g- Spiritual Progress: <20>With this kind of
marriage, humans can reach
Pure Consciousness in the middle of the family life. Man should
not forsake the family in order to pursue a spiritual life. With
understanding the realities behind things in this universe and their
Darmas (natures), the human can realize all things are
spiritual. <21>As man follows the Laws of
God as they have been set
up, he can continue living in society and doing actions without
being bound by them.
2- Understanding Marriage From A Social Point Of View:
a- A Unit Block Of Society: <22>As many small
bricks create a building, many families make up the society. If a
building is composed of strong, well-chosen bricks, it will be
strong. Similarly, if the families are strong and well-formed, the
society will be strong also. <23>A society with confused
family planning, many divorces, and misunderstanding the importance
of strong families is a weak society, no matter how wealthy or
powerful it might look.
<24>However, a society with a strong family structure is like
a house built on stone. It will not be shaken with
wind, flood, or disasters.
This kind of society can easily withstand negative forces against
itself. <25>In fact the very reason for those societies which
have developed highly and have become powerful is based on their
strong family structure, and the reason for their fall is based on
the loss of their early family structure because of prosperity which
brings greater
self-centeredness.
<26>Therefore, also understanding and following the truth
behind marriage from a social point of view is a must.
b- Satisfaction Of Physiological Needs: <27>The
human body is created in such a way that it is also physically
attracted to the opposite sex. The best way to satisfy this need is
through marriage with the other part which will result in the
highest experience of the relationship between a man and a woman.
<28>In fact, this is the only acceptable way to satisfy this
physiological need.
c- Companionship (Satisfaction Of Psychological Needs):
<29>Marriage is also the most perfect way to bind two beings
together so closely to form the best friendship possible. This will
satisfy the psychological need of having companionship for those who
have this need.
d- Best Environment For The Growth of Children: <30>An
ideal marriage creates a loving, secure, and suitable environment
for children to grow physically, mentally, emotionally, and
spiritually in order to create a great society.
3- The Ritual Of Marriage And Its Significance:
a- <31>The man is asked if he is fairly sure that the
woman is his soulmate, because when two parts as soulmates marry,
they will never divorce. <32>He should take an oath that he
understands the merits, reasons, and philosophy behind marriage
completely, understands his duties as protector and provider, and
also will help his partner to grow physically, mentally, and
spiritually.
b- <33>The same questions are asked and an oath is taken
from the woman, that she understands the virtues of marriage and
will be the comforter and loving wife as the center of the family,
etc.
c- <34>An oath is taken from the audience that they will
help the couple (as much as possible) in their growth, physically,
mentally, and spiritually, and also will help them to become
established in their marriage (society is responsible for the
individual as the individual is responsible for society).
d- <35>The couple is announced to be wife and husband.
<36>Also the bride and groom can each have a candle in their
hands and at the end of the ceremony, light them and exchange them
as the
lights of their
consciousnesses. They can bring the candles together to form one
flame as a symbol of having merged together and become one.
<37>Then while the two flames are still merged as one, they
bring the candles to a dish with water which is close to them. They
extinguish the flame by immersing it into the water. <38>The
extinguishments of the flame symbolizes the death of the
ego into ashes by becoming One in
God (consciousness,
water) and <39>continuation
of their spiritual marriage even beyond death.
<40>Then the bride and the groom take some of the burned
ashes from their candles by their thumbs and put the ashes on each
other's forehead (third
eye,
ego). <41>This
further is a symbol of how each will help the other in the process
of becoming one with
God (consciousness) and
their
egos will become ashes in
Him.
<42>They will become One with each other in
God.
<43>The candles are wet and cannot be re-lit. The couple is
sealed together forever in God.
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